Two Beat Newbie eBook Harry Whitewolf
Download As PDF : Two Beat Newbie eBook Harry Whitewolf 
A New Beat Newbie number twobie? Ooby dooby! Yes indeedy, we’re back in the slams of British wry wit verse jams. A lyrical, satirical, unequalled sequel with words like hot treacle. A call to be peaceful. Set to the beats, y’all. Find poems and prose full of politics, lunatics, rhythmic kicks, digital ticks, hedonistic highs and desperate fights, alongside conspiracy facts, plastic bags and modern age mockery, mixed with spoonfuls of sage-full top-notchery. Phew! Stop by, do. Don’t be averse. Sample some unique new wonders of wicked Whitewolf verse!
Including Postman Pot, Bilderbergers And Fries, 100 Channels Of Crap, Gimme Medication, The Newtopia Newbies, Dig It All Digital, F*** You GCHQ, Tridentity, Yawn Porn, and the rollicking ride of Right On Brighton.
So come on, don’t be loopy- read Two Beat Newbie!
Two Beat Newbie eBook Harry Whitewolf
Good to get another collection from Harry Whitewolf. He styles himself as a Beat poet but is actually something unique in his own right, writing repetitive, rhythmic, barbed and highly political poems that fall, every now and then, into unexpected humour or tenderness. He has also ventured into travel writing, and is a talented illustrator and cartoonist. Two Beat Newbie, however, is purely poetry. It’s his third such collection, after New Beat Newbie and Propaganda Monkeys, both published in 2015. The former contained recent poems, while the latter was a compilation of much older work. Both were memorable. So is this.As with any collection, which poems one likes is a very personal thing. I find Whitewolf best when he attacks the hypocrisies of modern life. I really liked A Bag Is For Life, Not Just For Christmas:
I bet you feel so good and eco-wise,
When you go to the supermarket,
Carrying your Bag For Life.
...Let’s see, first we have Plastic wrapped salad chives.
What else? Plenty
Of other veg,
All wrapped in plastic.
Need some bread,
Wrapped in plastic.
Pick some HP Sauce, In a plastic bottle.
Another piece, Gimme Medication, is a clever satire on the way we are, quite legally, doped up to our eyeballs. The Six o’Clock News is a wonderful list of trivia – Hollywood gossip, footage of kittens, an item on whether it’s OK to pee in swimming pools, and finally: “And World War III ‘could be over by next year’ says US official”. There’s plenty more in the same vein (100 Channels of Crap, for example) and it’s very good. Some of it is clearly deeply felt; a poem called Short and Long Division, for example:
Me and my neighbour hated each other.
Our street hated the next street, so me and my
neighbour would then stick together.
...Our country hated another country, so our counties would then stick together.
If there’s anything missing from this collection, it’s the personal note that you find in Whitewolf’s Propaganda Monkeys, which has his oldest poems. Pretty much everything in Two Beat Newbie is political. The one big exception is Right On Brighton, a paean of praise to the raffish and vibrant city on England’s south coast where he lived on graduation. The rest is dissent (including a couple of pieces that seem to support conspiracy theories).
Still, Whitewolf does dissent pretty well. He is an interesting and often gripping poet, someone whose thought processes are original and his own. And he has a knack for picking up on the frustrations and stupidities of contemporary life that we all feel but do not articulate. He articulates them. This for example is from a longish piece called Joy of the Modern World:
We’re sorry, but you are unable to withdraw
funds at this time. We’re sorry, but we are unable to process your
request at this time.
... You have one more attempt.
Restart browser.
Forgotten password.
What is your mother’s maiden name?
What’s the name of your first pet?
Anyone who has ever felt like lobbing their laptop or their phone at the wall in frustration will love this. I hope Harry Whitewolf keeps up his relentless attack on the crassness of TV, the hypocrisy of retail madness, the vapidity of social media and more, because we need him.
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Two Beat Newbie eBook Harry Whitewolf Reviews
A sequel that is better than the original, if that is possible. He has honed his wordplay perfectly and produced an entertaining collection of observational poetry we can all relate to in our lives. Funny, fresh and definitely re-readable. Keep them coming, Harry!
Whitewolf's poetry reads to me like song lyrics, like silent anthems for a non-existent collection of disconnected people. They range from political rants to humorous everyday observations to wistfully autobiographical factoids and more.
In a sense you've thought everything you'll ever read in the poems-- such is often the case with the best artists-- though you've never seen your thoughts this lyrical, this open, aching or humorous. If you want to shy away from them because you find them too sincere (interesting, that!), do read on and listen (yes, listen read them aloud they're already in your voice!) to how they plead with you and the world for returns to basic kindness in every possible form.
Reach out, read and support this mad, sad. joyous, lonely, confused, compassionate and playful friend of yours, waiting for you to chime in with his anthems )
Harry has an uncanny way of making you feel high when reading his work…I’m feeling high on poetry right now!
If New Beat Newbie was the appetizer, then why not just skip dinner and go straight to dessert with Two Beat Newbie?
Harry rolled up New Beat Newbie into a sweet hash joint and smoked it into Two Beat Newbie and partied all night in Brighton.
There was no taming Boom box Harry with brick bar love notes, smashing elitists’ heads…he was fantastically out of control in this one and it could probably be used to start a revolution! That is….if anyone could ever manage reading his poems out loud…. my dear neuropathways are all tangled up now, loved it!
Well done, Mr. Whitewolf
How many times can you say the sequel is better than the original?
Well this one is - better than New Beat Newbie which I also gave 5 stars.
Each poem short and easily digestible and instantly relatable - each one felt like it either contained a heartfelt humanitarian message or else an admission of personal suffering and of enduring the human condition. But always, every word of every page felt honest and as close as a poet could be to egoless.
Also loved the Whitewolf's "don't give a flying f$^#" attitude (which he always had but now has taken it to the extreme) and reading his apparently uncensored emotions in this brilliant volume felt like I'd crawled into this poet's head to observe his thoughts live as they occur.
Bravo Lord Whitewolf!
Wicked words that move!!!
I hope this review isn’t redundant of the review I wrote for Harry Whitewolf’s previous book of poems, “New Beat Newbie” but Whitewolf has done it again in this new volume of poems “Two Beat Newbie”. His scintillating and playful use of words makes this volume an entertaining and at times thought provoking read.
Whitewolf certainly has the poet’s gift of using words in a playful manner and finding associations in the words and phrases that a reader might not have put together before.
Don’t worry if you’re one of those people that think poetry is inaccessible or dry and relies heavily on tired themes. Whitewolf turns his eye and pen (electrons?) towards the modern, the internet, politicians, and isolating ourselves ever more with ‘social’ media. Whitewolf also tackles bankers and those of the 1% that revel in disparity. I imagine “Two Beat Newbie” to be a book that’s read at an Occupy London protest or a “Howl” for the politically poetically inclined.
Good to get another collection from Harry Whitewolf. He styles himself as a Beat poet but is actually something unique in his own right, writing repetitive, rhythmic, barbed and highly political poems that fall, every now and then, into unexpected humour or tenderness. He has also ventured into travel writing, and is a talented illustrator and cartoonist. Two Beat Newbie, however, is purely poetry. It’s his third such collection, after New Beat Newbie and Propaganda Monkeys, both published in 2015. The former contained recent poems, while the latter was a compilation of much older work. Both were memorable. So is this.
As with any collection, which poems one likes is a very personal thing. I find Whitewolf best when he attacks the hypocrisies of modern life. I really liked A Bag Is For Life, Not Just For Christmas
I bet you feel so good and eco-wise,
When you go to the supermarket,
Carrying your Bag For Life.
...Let’s see, first we have Plastic wrapped salad chives.
What else? Plenty
Of other veg,
All wrapped in plastic.
Need some bread,
Wrapped in plastic.
Pick some HP Sauce, In a plastic bottle.
Another piece, Gimme Medication, is a clever satire on the way we are, quite legally, doped up to our eyeballs. The Six o’Clock News is a wonderful list of trivia – Hollywood gossip, footage of kittens, an item on whether it’s OK to pee in swimming pools, and finally “And World War III ‘could be over by next year’ says US official”. There’s plenty more in the same vein (100 Channels of Crap, for example) and it’s very good. Some of it is clearly deeply felt; a poem called Short and Long Division, for example
Me and my neighbour hated each other.
Our street hated the next street, so me and my
neighbour would then stick together.
...Our country hated another country, so our counties would then stick together.
If there’s anything missing from this collection, it’s the personal note that you find in Whitewolf’s Propaganda Monkeys, which has his oldest poems. Pretty much everything in Two Beat Newbie is political. The one big exception is Right On Brighton, a paean of praise to the raffish and vibrant city on England’s south coast where he lived on graduation. The rest is dissent (including a couple of pieces that seem to support conspiracy theories).
Still, Whitewolf does dissent pretty well. He is an interesting and often gripping poet, someone whose thought processes are original and his own. And he has a knack for picking up on the frustrations and stupidities of contemporary life that we all feel but do not articulate. He articulates them. This for example is from a longish piece called Joy of the Modern World
We’re sorry, but you are unable to withdraw
funds at this time. We’re sorry, but we are unable to process your
request at this time.
... You have one more attempt.
Restart browser.
Forgotten password.
What is your mother’s maiden name?
What’s the name of your first pet?
Anyone who has ever felt like lobbing their laptop or their phone at the wall in frustration will love this. I hope Harry Whitewolf keeps up his relentless attack on the crassness of TV, the hypocrisy of retail madness, the vapidity of social media and more, because we need him.
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